I grew up in a town south of Boston, MA.
Ever since I was a child I would see, hear and play with Spirit. I saw no separation between the Human world and the Spiritual world. They were one and the same. To finish the rest of my story, I'll need to give this Human-Spiritual world something to refer to: it looked like a never ending clear cloud.
I would only see this Cloud when I was alone in my room, until one day, everything changed...
I was about 5 years old, and my parents were having a family party. I was playing with the Cloud in my room when I heard my mom call me to let me know the people were there. I felt so sad, as always, that I had to leave the Cloud, but I told it that I would be back later.
As I joined the party, I was looking up at all the people. I noticed that the Cloud was around each adult and it began to come more and more into focus. It was filled with the adult's many different past-life and present-life experiences.
“This was weird,” I thought. “The Cloud never comes out of my room, or comes with me when I leave my room…”
Each adult’s Cloud was filled with countless pictures, sounds and words, looking like a live movie! The Clouds were illustrating the adult's Spiritual Being, Emotional Being and Human Being, with all kinds of deep-significant past and present situations and relationships.
I felt a strong, yet very soft and loving beckoning from all the Clouds. I felt like the Clouds wanted to tell me something very important about each adult. As I looked at one of the Clouds to listen, within seconds, faster than seconds, it showed me where the adult was on their path of healing and awakening. I saw how they could heal their issues faster, with the least amount of effort and embody who they really are, faster and easier.
I was shown specific, unhealed emotions and relationships from their past-life and present-life that were making it impossible for the adult to feel free today. Their past unresolved emotions were making their whole healing process take longer. The Cloud showed me exactly what the adult needed to hear about these old emotions so they could heal and release them much faster and easier. All the adult needed to do was listen.
I then found myself next to my dad and his mother. My dad was laughing out loud with my grandmother, but that was not what was in their Clouds. There was a lot of sadness in their Clouds.
Suddenly, a ‘Little Daddy’ came out behind my father’s left knee and said, “Hi.”
“Oh, hello.” I said.
“We don't like her,” the Little Daddy said pointing to my grandmother.
“Oh.” I replied.
“Do ya wanna know why?” Little Daddy asked.
“Com'on, let's go...” Little Daddy grabbed my hand and proceeded to lead me on a journey. I had the feeling that we were going somewhere very specific and important.
During our journey, we passed by numerous live-images of my dad with his mom. They were moving pictures filled with aspects of my father doing or creating something, then showing these things to his mother or talking about it with her. He would show her his creations with the innocent proud feelings of, “Look what I did. Look what I discovered. Look what I made from that discovery.” She would always look angry and annoyed, like she was being bothered. She would critique his work in some way and tell him how he could have done it differently. In all the movies, my father would have the deflated feelings of ‘not good enough,’ frustration, sadness, feeling left out, and loneliness after being around his mother.
We came to the end of these movies and Little Daddy said, “We never felt good enough for our mommy. No matter what we did, she was never happy and that made us feel sad and not good enough.” Little Daddy went into more detail about these feelings and then began to describe that his mother was angry because her husband (his father) died. He said she never dealt with her grief and anger and that's why she was always angry and still is angry. He showed me how her unhealed anger came out at my father every time he showed her his latest creation. At the end of his explanation Little Daddy said, “So... now do you wanna see where the feelings of ‘not good enough’ came from BEFORE our mommy?”
“Ok.” I said.
The movie place disappeared and we went into the Spiritual World that I had always seen when I was alone in my room! Little Daddy explained to me that these 'not-good- enough' feelings were already inside him before this life and that they just got triggered again by his mother's anger and behaviors. He then took me into the root causes of where these feelings originated from and explained to me why they were there, how they were there, and how they could heal for good.
After this experience with my dad and Little Daddy, the same thing would happen when ever I was around people. I would see their inner-life, what issues they were trying to heal, and and how they could heal them faster and move on for good.
I always thought everyone could see and hear what I did so I never said what I saw out loud … until my High School years.
I started saying what I was seeing out loud and it quickly became very apparent that nobody saw what I saw. I soon became the “weird one”, the “too deep one” and was labeled the “buzz-kill” at parties and hangouts. It became too painful and isolating to keep sharing. So, I chose to stop sharing what I saw out loud. This choice eventually lead me to forget my gifts.
Until 10 years later...
I was engaged to be married. After 2 years of being in the relationship, something started to feel wrong in my heart. This was the first time that I became aware of my heart as an adult. I started to feel my inner guidance and an endless beckoning within. I began to tap into my own inner-world and I saw that my heart did not want to be with my fiancé. After a lengthy painful process of inner reflection, realizations and listening to my heart's guidance, I eventually ended the engagement and moved to San Francisco, CA a year later.
I was in San Francisco for three months and waitressing at two jobs. One day, while in the middle of a break between jobs, I took a walk on Golden Gate Bridge. This bridge was always a source of great inspiration for me since moving to San Francisco. I began thinking about what I wanted to do with my life, and suddenly an aunt that had died when I was a child, started talking to me. “Don’t worry, everything is going to be alright.” It felt so deep and right inside, so familiar, but I thought I was hearing things and making it up in my head.
I had no idea that this experience was to be the beginning of my gifts returning and that when I would walk into work the next day, my life, and LIFE as I knew it, would never be the same again...
That next morning I was walking to work from Twin Peaks to the Gordon Biersch restaurant on the Embarcadero. I loved my long walks down Market Street. The crazy, colorful nightlife street was such a sweet, gentle morning quiet. As I turned the corner of Market Street and Embarcadero, I suddenly felt 500 feet tall! My whole body was buzzing. I felt one with everything and like I knew things of great importance. As I was was walking by the San Francisco Bay, I felt like the water was a part of me, the rocks were a part of me, the Bay Bridge was a part of me. There was no separation, they were all an extension of me.
As I got to the entrance steps of the restaurant, one of my co-workers walked through the door. “Good morning,” he said to me. Out of nowhere, my co-worker’s Cloud appeared. Then a part of him popped up next to his human body and said, “I went on a date last night and she reminded me of my mother, so that date sucked!!" This part of him kept talking to me about specific details of the relationship with his mom.
“Hm, interesting,” I thought, and then I just went about my day. For whatever reason, I did not seem to be too fazed by this. (At this point, I had not yet remembered that I would see these things when I was a kid.)
All day long I was taking orders for food from people, but hearing and seeing people’s inside-parts explaining what was significantly happening in their lives. “I got a divorce,” “My knee hurts,” “I’m afraid of...”
I was at my last table for my shift. As a woman was ordering her hamburger, I heard her inside-self say, “I can't believe I didn't get that job promotion. I worked my ass off and my boss gave it to JOE!!!”
Suddenly, her ‘Little Girl-Self’ arose behind her. Her Little-Girl-Self showed me that when she was younger her father gave all his attention to her male cousin. She would get very upset every time that happened because she wanted her dad’s attention so badly. So, not only was her adult self upset that she did not get the job promotion, her Little-Girl-Self was deeply upset because a MAN got the job... just like her male cousin getting all the attention! I saw that this woman's upset was super-charged, both from present day anger and child hurt and anger!
At this point, I had seen and heard so many people’s inner parts throughout my day at work. It all felt so true in the core of my Being, but I had not yet said anything out loud to anyone. I really wanted to ask someone... out loud... so... I asked this woman.
“Excuse me,” I said.
“I have something really weird to ask you. Were you just thinking about your job and how you did not get that promotion?”
With a combined look of shock, but yet a deep ‘yes’ in her eyes, she said, “YES, HOW DO YOU KNOW THAT!!??”
“Holy shit,” I said to myself... “I don't know... what is happening to me??!!” And yet, at the same time, this all felt so deeply right, calming and familiar.
Suddenly, everything stopped, like someone hit the pause button for everything around me. These huuuuuge Beings came to me. They began to describe the human experience, our emotions, what happens when we don’t feel our feelings and hundreds of other different kinds of information was being poured into me. Somehow I finished my shift and I got myself home.
When I got home, my roommate was home. I felt this deep urging to give him a ‘reading,’ even though I had no idea what that meant. I just wanted to do what was happening to me all day but, I didn’t know how to MAKE this happen because it was just happening all on it’s own. So, I asked him, “Can I give you a reading?”
“Something has been happening to me all day and I want to see if I can do it with you.”
Now, I had no idea what to do and how to ‘get in there.’ I remembered television movies I saw where someone was missing and they could get a psychic to hold one of the missing person’s items and the psychic would get information about that person. So, I thought I'd give that a try. I knew the ring he wore was very significant to him.
“Give me your ring.” I said.
He gave it to me. I held it and moved it all around in my fingers, waiting for something to happen and suddenly, something did! I felt a feeling in my heart. I knew the feeling was not mine, I knew it was my roommate’s.
The feelings felt angry, upset and frustrated. I asked him if he was feeling this way.
“Yeeeeees...” he said.
As I was feeling the details of what the emotions were, suddenly a picture popped up in front of me. It was a picture of my roommate and a man from his work in conversation. As they were talking, I saw countless energy layers coming off of each of them. Different energy layers in each of them were reacting to their conversation. The energy layers had the same emotions I felt in my heart and was asking my roommate about. As I watched their human selves talk, I could see that their human selves were not conscious of what their energy parts were feeling, but simultaneously their human selves were reacting from their energy-parts anyway!
Suddenly information started pouring in about a past unresolved anger my roommate had inside of him that was being brought up from the conversation with the man. I saw this anger had shame and guilt attached to it and how all of these unresolved feelings affected him at work. I saw that the unresolved feelings affected how he feels and responds in relationships with women.
As I was describing what I was seeing to my roommate, I suddenly heard, "Tell him his Dad needs him. Tell him his Dad needs him."
I was kind of freaked out by this voice and not sure I should tell my roommate. Then I heard it again, "Tell him his Dad needs him." The warm, collective, echoing voice was quite persistent. The information was coming from the most powerful loving energy I had ever felt. It was those huge Beings that came to me at work!
The energy kept building and building inside me to tell him and although I was quite unsure of this, I told him anyway.
“Your Dad needs you,” I stated in a shaky, point-blank way.
He looked at me with complete shock and anger and said, "WHY would you say that!!! WHY would you say that??”
“Oh NO!, I pissed him off!” I thought. “Tell him again,” the large loving voice said.
“I keep getting to tell you your dad needs you and I don’t know why,” I said.
“My dad left me and my mom 15 years ago and I have not seen or talked to him since,” he said with much upset.
Suddenly, all that anger, guilt, shame and the other feelings that I saw in the beginning of the reading and again in the conversation with the man at work, came pouring back as my roommate told me that he thought it was all his fault that his father left. I was shown the reason why his dad left and that it had nothing to do with him.
His dad felt that he was too young to be married and a father. He felt that he did not have what it would take to be a good dad and husband. He thought he would save his family from himself and so, he left.
Information poured in layer by detailed layer of how my roommate could heal the unresolved feelings of guilt that it was all his fault his dad left. Once this feeling was healed, it would effortlessly ripple into his life and change how he is at work and his relationships with women.
This healing information was coming from the Loving Beings, through my own heart and from all around me. The reading lasted for what felt like hours.
The next day, I woke up and thought," Huh, well, that was weird, how can I know all that deep stuff about people... must have been a fluke, but... I WANT TO DO IT AGAIN!"
As I walked to work that morning, suddenly all that ‘reading-energy’ started up again. This time I asked my co-workers, “Gimme your watch, your earrings, your bracelet...” whatever was important to them. I did readings all day long.
I got home from work and my roommate was home, crying his eyes out. The top of our coffee table was full of tissues. I immediately felt, "UH-OH, must be from my reading the day before..."
"Are you alright?" I said hesitantly.
He came towards me, eyes all puffy, filled with love, shock, happiness, and gratitude, all pouring out at once. I had never seen anything like that before.
"Do you remember when you told me my dad needed me?" he said shaking.
"Ahhh, yeah...," I said, still feeling that uh-oh feeling like what I said must have fucked him up.
“Well, I called my mom today and she found his number and I called him.”
"You did?!" I asked, still feeling uh-oh.
"He was so happy to hear from me! He said that he stayed away all these years because he thought he was doing the right thing to stay away and he didn’t want to screw me up. We're gonna have lunch tomorrow and start a relationship! Thank you so much!"
Everything in that moment paused again! My roommate was still talking, but that deep silence was all around me again. The huge loving Beings came back and said," You have the ability to see the root causes of people's issues and how they can heal them." I knew this is what I was to do. This was "the thing" I was waiting my entire life for.
After that day, the feelings of deep realization and an inner prompting started to uncontrollably and continually take over my life. I felt compelled to do readings for co-workers, friends, family and anyone who would listen. As I would do each reading, I would learn something different about what kind of healing and understanding I could bring forth for each person to help them understand themselves and heal faster, easier and sweeter. I saw that we are all one on the inside, but our stories are unique and what they need to heal and understand is unique too. My gifts began blossoming and deepening at a rapid rate and I felt a deep pull to sit with Spirit and learn. And learn I did.
For the next 4 years I sat on my couch in Northern California and meditated with Spirit as my teacher, learning about my gifts. This learning ultimately lead me to stop waitressing and create a professional practice as a healer. As my gifts opened and deepened more and more, so did my sight and ability to deeply connect with my clients.
After 8 years of working in person with clients in California, I started to feel like I needed to go back to the East Coast and do some personal healing. As leaving California was approaching, I said to my clients, “Hey, do you want to try to do this over the phone?” They were up for it.
My phone businesses boomed and I suddenly began working with people all over the world. That lead to a full time phone healing practice for over 21 years now.
In 2010, I began witnessing a great awakening taking place within my clients. The True-Self was surfacing and coming to life within everyone. This completely changed my work. Not only did my work continue focusing on healing the unresolved issues but also on awakening. Seeing the complexities of how my clients are waking up and the quickest, easiest ways to embody their true-self and their heart's rightful path.
My work has helped thousands of people deeply understand themselves and heal on the utmost, fundamental levels. The work is so intimate, vulnerable and full of compassion, humbling Grace, miracles, and laughter.
My life is dedicated to the continual practice of surrendering into my own heart's truth, and embodying my rightful path, which always brings my work to new levels.
I met my husband Michael in NYC in 2009. This began a new life's adventure within relationship. Trusting our hearts' guidance individually and together as a couple is our full time job, continually deepening our relationship with our selves and each other. Life has moved us around the US for that past 9 years which has been challenging, healing and brought a ton of growth and inner freedom.
Jackson, Wyoming began calling us in 2016. After 2 years of a lot of inner work, trust and following the zig-zag path, we've finally moved to heart's destination in April of 2018.